Evil in the Office

Does evil lurk in your office? It lurks in mine waiting for the chance to work in a dig or a rub whenever it can. It hides under desks, behind the fax, in the mailslot and in the keyboards. It makes me sick. Why can't the office be evil free. There has to be an evil free place somewhere and that is the place where I want to work.

Here are just a few of the latest things that evil has done.

• A birthday card was being passed around for all to sign for another employee in the office. some jealous crows decided to put the card on her desk and ask the birthday girl if she had signed the card yet, knowing good and well it was for her. Luckily finishing shoes and I saw what was happening and ran over and snatched the card away from her before birthday girl had a good look at it. What did the crows say when they were confronted by me about the goof? "Oops, my bad." Evil!
• There was a birthday card circulated about 2 months ago for a girl who works in another unit. Someone actually signed the card, "Happy Birthday Wannabe." That was mean and really evil
• Some of the woman have formed a birthday club where they get small gifts and go out for lunch for the club members. Well 2 newer employees were asked to join the club and for 6 months they bought gifts for others and paid for the communal lunches. When their birthdays came around, the other club members did nothing. No gifts and no lunch. To make matters worst, the club members never mentioned anything about their birthdays ever again. The 2 employees never went to lunch with them again and the club members have treated them like they never ever went to lunch with then at all. Really cruel!
  
• Dont's go on vacation and forget to put things on top of your desk away..like staplers, recorders, whatever... when some peopel come back...usually the less popular ones.. all their stuff has been replaced with broken items. There desks are used for spare working office equipment when they are gone. It is evil to come back from vacation and have none of your stuff on your desk and all the items are broken. Evil!
• Food. Yes people do bring food from home to have at lunch time. Most bring some sort of frozen dinner. Some people, and they are always the same ones, will forget their lunch or have no money to buy lunch for themselves , will go into the fridge and eat the lunches of others, vowing to replace it. Needless to say, replacement is hit or miss.. Usually miss.
• There is alot more disguised in the form of pointed emails or messages to managers. Sometimes evil in the office takes the form of non team work behavior which can mess up deadlines or negotiations.
  

Sometimes I get sick of it. It is all so petty. Especially the birthday stuff. I mean we are grown adults not kids begging for a birthday party. it is just crazy. That birthday stuff is NOT EVEN job related, but if affects how people act toward each other and how they interact when people are out.

I wonder if there is a market for office excorcists? Maybe I could change carreers? I can get some holy water and seek out the office instigators. When I get through with them they will be demon free. Can't we just all get along? I hate to have to referee some of the craziness that I have to in my office. Remember this post? Scandalous Shoes! Unbelievable!

What I do is kick them in the pants with a diamond buckled shoe!
~~Aileen Mehle~~